Saturday 11 September 2010

NOT SO SCRUMMY MUMMY!

You know who I am. I'm that thirty (and then some) woman you see in the playground. Void of make-up, yawning uncontrollably and thanks to my 'unruly' hair I resemble an older version of a brunette orphan Annie. Plus, some days I am blessed with a generous smear of weetabix or dairylea on the butt of my jeans.
I have 3 sets of hair straighteners and enough make up to coat a circus troupe, yet for some strange reason neither manages to venture into my hands as they are already full of dishcloths, hair bobbles and lunch boxes. Plus, by the time I get the children to bed, all I want to do is sleep.

It's a typical Saturday morning, and while I have spent most of the week with hoover and dishcloth constantly in hand, it appears the dirt elves have been on the rampage in the night and left sticky finger marks everywhere. Who knew one biscuit could make so many crumbs?
And the things you find courtesy of having 3 kids? Hmm. Well, for starters, I've discovered a pair of Bart Simpson underpants hiding behind the loo with my ten year old swearing he has no idea how they got there.

I am also in mourning, as my favourite jeans and the only pair that fit me comfortably have bit the dust. I'm resorted to wearing a tight denim number which I cannot breathe in and every time I move the zip travels southwards. I refuse to wear a size larger and am officially on a diet, having only eaten half a packet of custard creams for breakfast instead of a full one.

A quick wash and a gulp of tea and I'm good to go. Shower time will have to wait...plus the twins love to venture in to the bathroom and stare at me like a museum exhibit and begin giggling when one of them emits the word 'boobies.'
Believe me, I've tried locking the door but that results in them both hammering on the wood and defeats the object of a relaxing shower.

It's only September and I am already in Winter mode. Resorting to changing into my pyjamas as soon as we are home from school, which my sons friend found particularly funny last night. There are 6 cupcakes left from the batch of 12 I made yesterday and they are all shouting my name from the kitchen counter top. I wonder if I eat only the butter cream and leave the cake.
Will that be half the calories?

I'm tired today, having been woken by my husbands usual 'talking' in his sleep (mainly telling the kids off although last week he said 'more tea vicar' which was hilarious). Last night the talking was accompanied by some cuddling which disturbed me in a way as he was doing this in his asleep...I admitt it's the most I'm likely to get at present...I just don't have the energy, plus I'm in the middle of reading a really good book.

Time to sign off, plus the dishcloth in my hand is making the keyboard a bit wet...

See you tomorrow...happy cleaning!